I do both.
Sure, sometimes I poke fun at the yellow ribbon brigade, 'cause I don't wear my heart on my sleeve. It doesn't mean I don't have a heart. There was a fleeting moment just after Maddie disappeared when I contemplated the cruelty and abuse she might be suffering. One has to delve into the deepest, blackest parts of their mind to imagine what a little child might go through in the hands of paedophiles and kiddie porn merchants. I don't dwell on that because firstly, we do not know what happened to her. It was reiterated again yesterday that there was no forced entry into the room, and although the police now believe she is likely dead, I hold out the possibility that she was either snatched by an opportunist passer-by to keep as their own child and not the subject of a website or crude film or private torture, or to sell to an illegal adoption agency for the same purpose, i.e. so somebody else could raise and nurture the child as their own.
Whatever her fate, I don't think it's worth brushing the fact that her own parents put her in this vulnerable position underneath the carpet, nor the reasons why they did it.
Another questioner on these boards asked, "Where should I go for Christmas with my 3 and 4 year old? I want to go somewhere hot". I answered that, at that young age, children should not be dragged halfway across the world so that the parent can enjoy sun and sangria. Small children and long-haul flights do not mix. Not only do they get cranky, bored, jet-lagged, they are much more vulnerable to decompression and the germs in re-circulated air than adults are. Small children and 100 degree temperatures do not mix, no matter how much factor 50 you smear on their tender skin. Small children are not interested in exotic beach holidays in countries where the food and the surroundings are unfamiliar. Even the marketing bosses of Disney do not recommend that parents take their children to their resorts until they are at least 5 years old. In many of the "hottest" (forgive the possible pun) destinations, Christmas isn't even celebrated in a big way. No Santa's grotto in Phuket, I'm afraid - they're all Buddhists. Christmas Day is not a holiday in Thailand.
All the responders except myself and two others made suggestions which were very much adult-orientated. One of those who did not suggested Lapland - hardly "hot", and I doubt it would be considered by the questioner.
I asked the questioner who really wanted to go "somewhere hot", i.e. did the 3-year-old say "Mommy, I really want to go to Thailand for Christmas this year".
If anything good comes out of the McCanns' experience, it will be that some parents (although I doubt many) will take a step back and say, "You know, I might enjoy spending Christmas in Jamaica, but will my 3-year-old?"
Too many parents nowadays want to have it all. They want to have children, but they want to continue to party like it's 1999. They want to jet off to exotic locations, eat spicy food and drink local beer, and then they realise, "Oh, what about those midgets in the nursery - should we leave them with babysitters for two weeks - what will the neighbors think? Hey, let's drag them along. After all, they're young enough to fly for free and stay in our room for free." People have to be reminded sometimes that the reason they had children (or the reason most people have children) is not just to propogate their gene pool or to get a deduction on their income tax or to occasionally dress up and show off. Children are human beings, and very needy ones at that - and the job of a parent is to fulfill those needs and put their children first.
What really burns me about the McCanns is, even after losing one of their children, they still do not seem to have learned their lesson! They only spend a couple of hours a day with their twins, they have decided to live in Portugal even though they have said they don't believe Maddie is still in Portugal. Now they plan to spend a few months jetting around Europe.
What about the needs of their children? They can give them a much more comfortable next few months in their own home, in their own beds, than in an apartment in Portugal or a hotel room in Spain or Italy.
As I said before, I tried to put myself in Maddie's position and it was not a nice place to be. God have mercy on that poor child and bring her abductors/tormentors/murderers to justice; she is my only concern in this matter. I do not cry for her openly; I cry for her privately.